We can all sometimes feel trapped and overwhelmed by our thoughts and feelings, by situations that challenge us, difficult relationships, or lack of relationships. Our problems may feel inescapable, intolerable, interminable. Or maybe we’re just not content with our lives, not flourishing in the way we’d hoped to be, but not entirely sure why.
Whatever difficulties you find yourself in, I would like to reach out to you with the assurance that you do not have to face these issues alone. Working together, we can do something to alleviate the distress you’re in.
I have helped clients face and cope better with relationships and family difficulties, depression, anxiety, low self-esteem and body image, trauma and abuse, as well as addictions, chronic pain, and anger. Together we can explore what factors might be contributing to your unhappiness, looking at the deeper roots of these problems as well as focusing on the here and now. This can help give you a better understanding of yourself and new skills to lead a more fulfilling life.
I offer a safe, confidential environment where you can unburden yourself to someone with genuine care and concern who is completely focused on you and your needs. Here you can share and talk through the feelings and difficulties you may be having.
Schemas are themes or patterns that begin early in our development and repeat throughout our lives. They are made up of memories, bodily sensations, emotions, and thoughts. Once activated, intense emotions are often felt and they can usually underlie long-term issues we feel we’re struggling with in how we relate to ourselves and others.
Generally, schemas develop from not having our core emotional needs met in childhood or adolescence. These core emotional needs include: secure attachments to others, autonomy, competence, a sense of identity, the freedom to express valid needs and emotions, spontaneity and play, as well as realistic limits and self-control.
When our schemas get activated, either in relationships or due to life circumstances, it can often feel like a “part” of us has taken over in some way that feels disruptive.
This part can be self-destructive or hurtful to others, as well as ourselves. Or it might be distancing, or dismissive. Or perhaps it just feels overwhelmed by anxiety or despair. This can often send our internal family system (the different, interconnected parts that make up our psyche) into disarray, resulting in a sense of our inner world as being conflicted, empty, or just deeply mired in suffering. We can sense this through our emotions (thoughts and feelings), but sometimes also as physical pain or illness.
IFS and Schema Therapy helps us to understand these parts better, find out which of our needs they’re trying to meet or compensate for, as well as giving us the tools to meet these needs in healthy and fulfilling ways.
In terms of therapeutic practice in general, I believe though that no matter how good the therapeutic model or skilled the practitioner, it is fundamental that you engage with someone you feel is on your wavelength and in a very simple way you actually like as a human being. For this reason, an initial assessment is key in terms of seeing if you feel comfortable talking to me, as well as gauging how I can be of help to you.
If this sounds like something you’d like to do, we can organise that via email or telephone (07804197605).
Please also feel free to drop me a line if you have any other questions regarding the therapy I offer.